the id, the ego, & the single misfiring brain cell

i've figured out how to get things done

I've discovered that the biggest secret to getting things done (since I'm a procrastinator with responsibilities) is to make a list then put it where I'll see it all the time. So I added a "To-do list" widget to my iGoogle home page. The only drawback is that that widget only takes 8 entries before it runs out of space. Who has only eight things on their to-do lists? Non-procrastinators, I'm thinking. But do non-procrastinators even need to-do lists?

Anyway, this summer, I managed to get a lot done by using this simple tool to both remind myself I had to do things and to repeatedly guilt myself into action (and it worked pretty well, considering my depression at the time). I put stuff on there like: hire a driveway contractor (a more involved process than you might think), get roof replacement bids, hire contractors, collect insurance money, cash insurance checks....

Yeah. I actually have to remind myself to cash checks, even when they're worth several thousand dollars. No, I'm not rich, exactly. I'm just...a procrastinator. It's a bit of a hassle to cash checks, anyway. I have to fetch the scanner from the basement, hook it up to the only laptop in the house that still runs on Windows, go to my bank's site, sign the check....

I swear, it was easier when we just ran by the bank drive-through when we went to get groceries, back in the day. (I can't do this, though; my bank is out of state.)

My current list has the following items:

- magically repair steamcleaner

- vacuum windows

- write essay

- natural gas installation

I probably have to explain a couple of those.

The steamcleaner has become, shall we say, finicky. We trade it back and forth with Kermit and Tracy, who also have buttloads of pets. Apparently, it stopped sucking at one point.

Or perhaps we should say it started sucking. You want your steam cleaner to suck, but in the literal sense, not the figurative one. So: it stopped and started sucking at the same time. Then it started sucking again but sucked at the same time it was spraying. Then someone fixed that. Now, it sprays without you telling it to, like an unneutered tomcat, and it sucks, which for the first time is unambiguous.

This is my first foray into the innards of the steamcleaner, even though I bought it new about four years ago and I probably should have tinkered with it at some point through there (which reminds me: what is the life expectancy on these things?). Thus, while I have a certain amount of confidence in my ability to figure out how stuff is supposed to work but isn't at the moment, I may or may not be successful this time and I may or may not have the needed part or ingenuity to make it work again.

I could just go buy a new one, I suppose, but I'm agin that. First, I don't believe in just tossing things aside when they cease to work. Most stuff can be fixed with just a little time and effort. I was raised in a powerfully waste-not-want-not environment, even though I'm two generations removed from the (last) Great Depression and sincerely cannot explain how irretrievably thrifty we are. I can't just throw things away when they quit working (I'm not a hoarder, either, because I try to fix them). Second, I don't have the money right now because I accidentally overpaid a bill by $4200 this month.

Ever had that happen to you? Ouch, huh?

You're wondering how you "accidentally" do this, I bet.

Remember that online banking I was talking about? Yeah. They have another feature which is also designed to save you time and effort. That is the automatic online bill payer. As it turns out, this does save time and effort right up until you fatfinger a bill amount.

I have no other explanation for it.

See, we decided to pay off the bills, including the mortgage, as soon as possible. Thus, I've been working up a budget, violating the budget and refiguring, then deciding how much extra I have after all bills are paid. I throw that amount at the house. The first month I did this, the amount came to something like $4200. (See where this is going?) Instead of doing this the logical way--leave the current monthly automatic payment at the minimum amount and creating a separate payment to use on an as-needed basis for extra monies thrown at the same mortgage--I just upped the auto payment the first month by...well, yeah. You know.

So the first month, everything was fine. :) The second month, I had the thought to just create a different setup for the "any extra" bits, and...I seem to have forgotten to correct the auto one. That's my best guess of what happened.

I realized my mistake when I saw the overdraft to my credit card for $2800. Oh my.

First, I panicked. Thankfully, my panic passes quickly, which releases me to think clearly. It took me one or two minutes to figure out what had happened. Then I balanced my checkbook and...well, it's all going to be okay. I just have to move some money around. But I won't be buying anything extra for a couple of weeks.

So...anyway. I need to work some magic on a steamcleaner.

There's also that "vacuum windows" thing....

Some of y'all have seen the pictures of my greatroom windows. They are fabulous. They show me the trees and the sky and the stars at night. The greatroom is 27 feet high, and the windows go almost to the top. I don't have to clean them very often, so I don't, as I consider the venture a bit dangerous.

I'm not planning to clean the windows today or tomorrow, but the sills have collected what appear to be hundreds of dead flies.

By the way, we have incredibly lethargic flies here. I've never seen such slow-flying, low-flying, fat, apathetic flies in my life. They're like B-52s. They don't even have a respectable drone. You don't get ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. You get zzzzzzz....zzz....zzzzzzz....z. It's like one or both of their engines is perpetually going out. They'll make emergency landings on your hands, your arms, your face. If you swat at them, they'll lazily buzz out of the way, unless you are actually trying to hit them. They're so slow they bore the cats.

Apparently, when they die, they don't drop to the floor so much as they drop to the ONLY SILLS IN THE HOUSE I NEED A HUGE HONKING LADDER TO GET TO. Maybe there is a Lord of the Flies, and he doesn't like me.

I thought it would be nice to clear the house of carcasses before Thanksgiving, so tomorrow (it's too dark now), I'll vacuum the windows.

The essay comment on my list makes sense. Does it even matter who I'm writing it for? It should be a permanent fixture on the list....

Natural gas installation. I'm talking about getting professionals out here to upgrade the propane appliances to natural gas, as we're moving up in the world. Those of you who were thinking snarky things about natural gas...you know me too well.

I just added "take uniforms to tailor" to the list. This isn't because I'm too fat to fit into my uniforms (which I am, but I don't think a tailor would be able to help that). It is because I finally bought new ones.

The Air Force changed their utility uniform something like...two years ago. I keep thinking, "The BDUs I bought in OTS* are still fine," so I haven't bothered investing in the new getup until now.

* Battle Dress Utility, Officer Training School

The BDUs will be entirely phased out in November 2011, though, and I will be in a remote site where I may or may not have access to a bonafide Clothing Sales store. Thus...I finally broke down and bought a couple of new ones, new boots, etc.

I pick up the new name tags tomorrow and have them and the new rank (etc) sewn on the new threads. The next time I have to get into uniform for something, people won't look at me like I'm a walking anachronism.

Gettin' thangs done. That's me. I'm off to operate on a steamcleaner now. Y'all be good.

d