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16 comments
Right on the money LT. Blameing others for your own failures has become all too acceptable in todays society. The bald truth laced with helpful advice can only help. Hang tough!
rick
VERY tactful response to his letter. I couldn’t have said it better myself!
melissa
You GO girl! - You told it just the way it SHOULD be told.
OK - so I’ve been lurking - not long though, I just found out you had this blog. (I’m always the last to know.) I know I spent waaaay too much work time reading everything all the way back to DAY 1 (busted). There were many times, had I been lurking all along, that I would have written back - but I was way behind the times. Now I am up-to-date and will continue reading and laughing along with the rest of the following. I look forward to your postings. Thanks for making MY day brighter.
Now I know why you want to become a writer. NO - make that – why you HAVE TO become a writer!
J
Very good answer to his letter. Question- I would like to post yours and Capt Garcia picture on the military bulletin board at church?
Bobby
Before I finished reading the guy’s letter I wanted to tell you to email him back and say…"look hea Mtur Fur…” BUT… your parents and family are reading this and I do not think it wise to write what I really think you should have written to him. Besides, I’m not the cursing or swearing type of person. [Big sigh] That letter, made me very angry, and I’m black! It really urks me when black men and women shift the blame of their failures and wrong choices on “da’ white man.” I am right there with you on the reversed discrimmination thing. Unfortunately, many young black Americans are raised to believe that the poor conditions and failures of reaching goals and dreams are the fault of “da’ white man keepin’ them down.” Many are also raised by their grandparents and older family members or guardians (because unfortunately their parents are either in jail or strung out on some substance abuse or have been shot dead) who then instill in the youngster that white people are people to be afraid of and think very ill of them or do not want them to succeed, thus begins the vicious cycle of reversed racism. I cannot go into the whole spill here, but yes, there are those out there who simply are “ig’nant!” Sorry you had to come across one, but I think your response was very, very, good, compared to what I would have written him, it was very professional, awesome approach. Bravo, Diana! :)
Interesting spate of responses to this one.
J (whoever you are),
I don’t plan to be a writer. I am a writer. (Unless you mean I should look into getting paid for it, in which case your point is well taken.)
Tal,
Is there a difference between getting old and going soft? As some anonymous wise person once said, “It’s amazing how much ‘mature wisdom’ resembles being too tired.”
Joleen,
Yeah, I know you wouldn’t talk like that. :) It irks me when anyone avoids taking responsibility for his own plight, regardless of what he finds to blame his failures on. That letter, however…. The assumptions built into that letter made it even more appalling. I appreciate the encouragement.
d
Dear One, I was tight inside when I read the letter, remembering some of the comments you have made in times past, for offenses far less that this. I was quitely thrilled that your training and age has resulted it some maturity of expression. Bravo! I think you handled this as well as , or better than, most professionals.
It hit me yesterday who “J” probably is. Jerry. It took me a while because I know two or three women who occasionally abbreviate their names thusly, and the “you GO girl” bit sounded feminine. It’s also something Jerry would say. ;)
Hope you’re doing well, Jerry. You haven’t updated me lately. How’s progress?
Daddy, ’tis true. I’m not sure which to blame it on: training or age. Or maybe both, aka “experience.” Also, the seriousness of the offense is in the eye of the offended; the intentions of the offender rarely matter once the offense is on the table.
Thank you for your approval. My responses to any given stimulus hinge on circumstances still, though. A career in diplomacy is not in my future.
d
Well said, D! (I thought he also had you pegged as black, but not sure of that, after re-reading his letter. But he DEFINITELY thinks you are made! Hmmmm. I get that comment almost every time I show someone new your photo (the one your teacher? called the “attitude” photo)! But you are definitely female, even if this guy doesn’t see it.
Yes, you ARE a WRITER!!! And you will, someday, get paid to write, I am sure. Keep it up, dear!
An excellent response, d! As a former potential OTS candidate and enlisted man myself, I completely understand the necessity of being able to communicate effectively. He says he has an IT degree, but it sounds like he spends a lot of time in online chat or something. He probably is also fluent in 1337-speak, a useless quality IRL (in real life).
I’d hope for his sake that he CAN communicate normally when necessary and that the email you received was the way it was because he felt it was very informal.
The race issue, though, would have concerned me as well. It seems he’s looking for trouble. It’d be hard to cure him of his paranoia of racial discrimination despite your assurances to the opposite. Still, I think you did the right thing in trying to help.
Your response was professional and well-thought out. From you, I would expect nothing less. Good job!
Am I the only one who thinks the letter writer did not mean to imply that he thought he would be worse off due to being black, but that he asked if he would be *better* off because of Affirmative Action?
This sentence makes me think just that:
“However my GPA is 3.0 only, but on the other hand i m COLOR man.”
Now, I’m not familiar with the GPA scale, as I am not American, but he uses the word “only” to describe it, which makes me think that 3.0 is not too good(?). Then he brings up the fact that he’s black.
Would it therefore not be reasonable to think that he was inquiring into whether the Officer School uses Affirmative Action in its admission criteria?
I had considered the possibility of an affirmative action reference, though it’s by no means explicit. 3.0 is a decent GPA, but not great… it means your average class result is an even B. 3.0 is also a common cutoff point for various scholarships and other postgrad programs, since anything lower means you didn’t take school too seriously and probably spent a lot of time empirically determining the effects of ethanol on the central nervous system. Of course, drinking didn’t have much to do with my 2.9 average - I was just depressed and tired and generally didn’t care for my program. At least, that’s the first 3 years. Senior year, I was drunk, depressed, and tired and generally didn’t care for the program.
Fortunately for some of us (but not our friend with the deficient writing skills), affirmative action in the armed forces only occurs at high levels where politics come into play. Getting a commission is basically a mechanical process if you have the numbers to qualify and you keep your nose clean in the training program.
Ahhh, but the numbers. The AFOQT isn’t going to treat you very well if you’re weak on English - because, as Diana said, we have to write a lot. Creative, interesting, engaging, politically correct, and persuasive - writing is half of my job, more for others. Even if you’re in an IT field, as an officer you supervise people who need guidance memos and performance reports and awards packages and counseling letters and countless other pieces of literature produced by you. As an officer, you also get stuck writing documents for your boss to sign. You write requests for training, materials, money, manpower, and all the other things that keep an organization running. Every one of these demands a strict format and just the right language.
So, in other words, he’s got a long way to go.
Sorry but the J was not me. I did sit in amazement over the content of the letter though. It is nice to know that there are still people out there that spell worse than me. Seriously though… I am saddened by the young man’s letter and its message. I applaud your response.
Speaking of spelling problems… where the heck is the spell checker on this thing?
My first thought when I read the letter was “Is this person allowed to carry a gun?” but I have been around long enough to know this type of attitude can be disguised by a seemingly well-polished exterior. I am only surprised that he chose to reveal himself by writing in such a manner. Your response, on the other hand, was thoughtful, accurate and extremely accurate - and will most likely be discounted as just another attempt to keep him down.
Lurk,lurk,lurk…
Love you and your writing, Cousin
Be Safe.