The transition from "do it now" to "do it right" brings with it the barnacle of politics.
Balad AB is a part of LSA Anaconda, a major hub of Army activity. It's been here quite a while, but not such a long while that you don't still see sandbagged defensive positions on buildings and destroyed war machinery from initial clashes (as well as the Iran-Iraq war, I think). Up until quite recently, the focus of the mission was "do it now." This means things didn't have to be pretty so long as they were functional. Along with deployment rigors comes a blessed absence of politics. Indeed, the job satisfaction and lack of politics together is what prompts so many people to volunteer to come here again and again.
As fate would have it, I got here just in time for the "do it right" phase to kick in. Balad's gaining visibility, and we all know what that means. That's right. We're infested with politics.
It's been getting steadily worse for a few weeks, but went into high gear when we got word last week that we weren't supposed to know but we were about to have some very high ranking DVs* come in soon. (Don't tell anyone, OK? It's all very hush-hush.) The result of such "non-news" is that within two hours, everybody knows. Why? Because, silly...you can't have flag officers visit a base with cigarette butts on the ground! The horrors! And who picks up the cigarette butts (paints trees, paints grass, paints rocks, paints anything that doesn't move, washes windows, mops floors....)? Dirty work like that trickles down to the lowest level. If you ever see a bunch of regular Air Force walking around base with garbage bags in tow and picking up rusted cans, and particularly if someone's painting rocks, five'll get you ten someone BIG is on the way.
* Distinguished Visitors.
So yesterday morning at roll call, after the obligatory "you aren't supposed to know but we're about to have important visitors" disclaimer, we all went for a walk to pick up cigarette butts. It wasn't just the airmen this time, although they were involved. What made this more pleasurable than it would have been otherwise is that it had begun raining that morning about dawn. As we walked, the mud slowly clumped on our boots like cookie dough. Thus stuff is grossly adhesive. You actually get taller as you walk. We policed much more than our "area" with trash bags in tow, then tracked mud through the building. Deeeelightful.
So then, I came into my office to work on LOEs* and decorations.
* Letters Of Evaluation.
Remember my rant about writing awards? Writing LOEs and decs is normally a similar exercise in exaggeration and obfuscation. Fortunately, however, we have enough good solid bald truth that little or no exaggeration was required. I was stuck with the opposite problem: wording it all in such a way as to impress upon whoever might read it that we really did this stuff exactly like the bullet says. For the record, it's easier to exaggerate and obfuscate than to attempt to impress people with the truth of anything while enmired in such a system.
I worked for two days writing the LOE and dec for my troop (TSgt Williams), then spent all day yesterday writing mine. Normally, my boss would do it, but he is fairly new at it and besides...I was more aware of the intimate details and mission impact of my actions than he was. Plus--and this cannot be understated--I had self-interest at stake. So I spent all day struggling to squeeze all I've done and the impacts each action had into eight 100-character bullets.
Ah yes. We only have eight bullets to work with. That's it. No matter how long you're here, no matter how important your work and mission accomplished, eight bullets. In case you're wondering what's the big deal, there simply isn't enough room to include all the necessary information. In the long run, that person's performance report gets shortchanged as a result.
Then there's the decoration dance. In a perfect world, decorations would be presented to those who deserve special recognition, when they've done something to merit it (just like it says in the Air Force Instruction*). Considering the fact that at least half any given population is average or below average by definition, this means less than half of the Air Force should, by rights, be wearing any medals at all. Theoretically.
* We don't have regulations anymore. Too draconian. We have "instructions," which are (again, theoretically) guidelines only, but "COMPLIANCE WITH THIS PUBLICATION IS MANDATORY." Right.
Here are a couple more relevant points outlined quite clearly in the AFI 36-2803, the instruction that covers decorations: 1. Rank is irrelevant to the medal awarded. 2. Medals will not be awarded on a quota system; those deserving of any given medal will be awarded that medal, period. One more point worthy of noting: medals count toward enlisted promotions, and officers are expected to have them above a certain rank if they wish to be further promoted.
OK. Ready or not, here's the reality: Medals are almost automatic at certain points in your career. You have to screw up pretty bad to be turned down for a medal when you PCS. Also, (traditionally) you have to have been pretty worthless while deployed to not merit some medal for (if nothing else) going into a wilderness for three months. Medals awarded for PCS are usually given for "meritorious service," which is another way of saying "you've been here for two years so you must have done something noteworthy" instead of "outstanding achievement," which is more for single-event recognition. The criteria for all medals, though, is the same (theoretically): you have to have gone the extra mile.
The standard medals are the AF Achievement Medal (AFAM), the AF Commendation* Medal (AFCM), and the AF Meritorious Service Medal** (AFMSM).
* For a large portion of the AF, this is called "an Accomodation Medal," which is often more accurate than its actual name.
** Commonly known as the "Master Sergeant Medal," with good reason.
So two weeks ago, we received word from TPTB* that members below the rank of Technical Sergeant would probably be turned down for anything more than an Achievement Medal, very few Commendation Medals would be awarded, and any Master Sergeant or above who was submitted for less than an MSM would probably be turned down, as well. I can't remember how the officers were chopped up. Probably achievement medals for lieutenants and commendations for captains. Something like that.
* The Powers That Be--hazy, shadowy figures at the top who make arbitrary rules.
Well, there went the first rule out the window. Yesterday, it got better, though (in the same sense that a root canal is better than a filling). We were told that all decoration recipients will have some development of airmen in their LOE. Also, almost all decorations will be submitted for entire flights--for individuals only by exception.
As far as the development of airmen bit, they mean did we encourage our troops to take online classes? Did we lead by example (who doesn't?)? Did we encourage them to get involved with their community? While deployed. Working 12-hour days. For four months straight.
There's nothing in AFI 36-2803 that requires "development of airmen" as a criteria for decoration. But...when you're about to put a star on your shoulder, as our wing commander is*, your word is law. So...now we have a new criteria for decorations--tossed in toward the end of our deployment while we're doing our write-ups and submitting our people for decorations, when it's too late to make sure they put in a couple of extra hours here and there for "development."
* Brigadier General (S) Hansen. (And what's another name for brigadier general select? Colonel.)
The most laughable part (hahahaha) is the submission by flight rule, though. I can see submitting an entire team for a decoration with the same citation* when that team worked their projects together. But most of us are one-deep. In our flight, for example, we all are working as project managers for different projects. If someone comes to me with anything about the Instrument Landing System, for example, I direct them to TSgt Williams. Land Mobile Radio tower? TSgt Sargent. Theater Battle Management Core Systems acquisition? That's mine. And so on. There is nothing in this flight that we work as a team. Nothing.
* The citation is supposed to say in detail (with lots of impressive numbers--and if you deserve the medal, impressive numbers will write themselves) what you did, what impact it had, and what mission was supported or furthered as a result of your actions. The citation is traditionally very specific: "TSgt Williams consummate leadership and quick thinking was key to halving the time required for installation of the $10 million Instrument Landing System. (Examples of precisely how he did it.), etc. TSgt Williams was instrumental in keeping planes from crashing into the ground."
I had nothing to do with the ILS. But I'll have the same citation. He had nothing to do with my rewriting the requirements process for the theater (huge effect, that), but he'll have the same citation as me. How are we supposed to generalize so we have a "flight achievement"? The answer is clear: the citation will be so general and vague that it will be meaningless. Not to mention, embarrassing to have read in public when the lucky recipients are pinned with their new medals.
"You laid 20,000 feet of outside cable and dug 15,000 feet of trenches? But I thought you worked the telephone switch!" Right.
And this just in: this morning, we had another added requirement for decorations. That's right! Hot off the presses from our Group Exec: "LOEs must have stratification on the last line for top 10% or above performers. In addition, LOEs accompanying decorations must show airmen development/volunteerism. This sets the best performers from the rest. LOEs not providing this info will guarantee disapproval of the decorations at the group level."
In case you're wondering, that isn't in the decoration instruction, either.
This is just getting disgustingly silly at this point. "Airman Snuffy, I know you single-handedly built a Land Mobile Radio from a coconut, two paperclips and a piece of dental floss while under fire, but you don't qualify for a decoration because you didn't take night classes."
Also, I read that to say only 10% of deployed personnel will be deemed worthy of decorations. Am I missing something?
The Morale Suppression Team is working overtime these days.
d
who will more than likely retire as a captain
